Monday, June 20, 2011

Man I am so Emo today....

There are times in this life where everything seems to go wrong, and you cannot seem to catch a break. You stop and wonder if you made it this way. Was it something I did wrong in my past? Is God punishing me for all the bad things I have done? Was it somebody I did not mean to hurt? Or was it someone I did? Is it karma? Are all the good things I have done in this life too little to make up for my mistakes?

I hate these times, and lately they seem to be coming all too often for me. It is always when I slowly get optimistic about something that everything just goes wrong. I have not really been able to enjoy all the blessings that have come my way because the bad just keeps on beating me down every chance I get.

I know. I am so depressing. I even annoy myself. I know I sound so whiney. Still, it helps me to vent. I need to let it out otherwise I’ll go crazy. Well, more crazy than I normally am, and Lord knows that it EXTREMELY crazy. *sigh*

Let me just say that I have tried to right my wrongs. I am truly trying to be a good person. I am not cruel, and even though I have though ill will on people who have hurt me, I would never want it to happen. I have even gone out of my way for a few people to try to make it better. I’ve done my part, so now it is up to them.

So my question is, why? Why does life continue to beat me down? I guess I’ll just have to wait and see. The only good part out of all of this is my loving husband and two wonderful children. At least I am not alone.

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